A Night To Remember - Part 3

Read - Part 1
Read - Part 2

Immediately sensing the internal turmoil running in Ste’s mind, Jamie began to curse inward silently. A small vicious voice from the deepest corner of his mind began to berate him “There you go again, Gangle. Jamming your foot in your mouth in the most importune moments”. Jamie tried to silence the sinister whisper but it continued unabated. “Just how far do you think of going with this? You’re crazy, Gangle? Looking for a beating, are you now?” the mocking voice seem to sneer at Jamie. Blinking hard as if trying to banish all leering thoughts swirling behind his eyes, Jamie came back to the reality of Ste sitting in front of him with a measured look on his face. Hesitantly, Jamie slowly sat up and moved slightly away from Ste. Although the distance between the two was imperceptible, it screamed of the realization that things would be different from this point on.

“Jamie” Ste began to softly whisper.

“Here, Ste. I’m sorry about what I said just now. I was just only joking you see” Jamie calmly said with a small smile that tried its best not to look bitter. “No harm done.” Jamie said as he tried to convince Ste as well as himself.

Ste stared into the twin pools that were the eyes of the boy sitting in front of him as he collected his thoughts. “Its not really the best thing to joke about, Jamie” he replied with a blank expression on his face.

“Shite! He’s angry at me” Jamie’s thoughts screamed silently at him as he tried to ready Ste’s reaction. “Sorry, Ste. I’m such a twat for taking advantage of your situation. I should have known better than that.” Jamie shakily said as he inched slowly away from Ste. Jamie tried his hardest to stem the tears of shame that suddenly threaten to wash him away as he cowered under Ste’s unwavering gaze.

Ste saw that Jamie was slowly moving away from him. The distance between them began to tug at his very soul as he felt a part of him slipping away. He had just found a lifeline in the form of the boy next door to pull him from his depths of despair. He realized now that Jamie was the lighthouse that he was looking for to lead him to safety as he navigated the passage of time. He was not about to let this fleeting chance to pass him by now that he had the power to do something about it. He never actually had any say when his Mum was snatched away in her prime just as he was learning about being loved. Now that he found a glimmer of that same love radiating out in warm waves from Jamie’s heart, he could not risk to lose it again over simple conventions.

Instinctually, Ste’s hand shot out to take Jamie’s firmly. He smiled as he noticed that Jamie jumped perceptively in his skin at the sudden touch. “Go for it” Ste smiled as he found himself in the position of making the next move. He was still unsure of what that next move would be but he was not about to let Jamie go.

“Any further Jamie and you’ll fall off the edge” Ste smiled as he shook Jamie’s hand slightly to jolt him from his thoughts.

Jamie looked dumbfounded at the hand that was pulling him back from the edge. Never in a million years would he have dreamed of this feeling that was equal amounts of anticipation and apprehension. He lifted his face slowly only to see a tender look emanating from Ste’s face. At once Jamie felt the warm glow of relief as he saw Ste’s beaming smile. He has seen that smile many time before but this time it felt different. It was as if the whole being of Ste was behind those lips telling him that he had nothing to fear from Ste tonight. This was were he chose to be and although Jamie wished that the circumstances that led Ste to his room tonight were very different, he was thankful that Ste was here with him.

“I thought that you were angry at me” Jamie finally said once the moment of relief passed them by.

“Angry? At what?” Ste replied as he slowly pulled Jamie’s hand into his lap.

“At me. At what I was …” The final word trailed as Jamie felt the pangs of shame returning. His eyes dropped down to the warm hands that was cradling his so tenderly.

“You were what, Jamie?” Ste said bemusedly. This was the first time that he was seeing Jamie squirmed with his words. Jamie had always been sharp with his tongue and being this tongue tied must mean that he had something difficult to say.

“At what I was thinking about” Jamie finally blurted out as a steady flow of blush began creeping up his face.

“How would I know what you’re thinking about? I’m not psychic, Jamie” Ste said as his smile grew wider at the thought of how infuriating this must be for Jamie. Try as hard as he did, the thought nearly caused a fresh bout of giggling.

Slowly lifting his face, Jamie saw the effort that it took Ste to hold back the giggles and immediately realised that Ste was enjoying all of this at his expanse. Taking his cue from Ste, Jamie pulled Ste’s hands and placed them on his chest.

“I was thinking if you would think that I was a tart if I just threw you on the bed and ripped that T-shift off so I don’t get tangled in them again” Jamie said as he mimicked a breathless starlet.

Not wanting to let Jamie have the last word this time, Ste moved closer to Jamie and locked his stare at him. “But, you are a tart, Jamie Gangle and I like tarts” Ste whispered and quickly stole a kiss from a stunned Jamie before they both started to giggle again.

Clearing his throat after the giggling subsided, Jamie seriously considered the situation. “ Seriously Ste, what do we do now?” Jamie said with the feeling of perfect calmness.

Jamie’s words seem to hang in the air for a moment as Ste paused to find the words to express his thoughts. Slowly he began to realise how warm and soft Jamie’s hands were as they lay there cradled in his. Ste lifted the hands slowly as if they were the most fragile items in the world and brought them close to his cheek. Immediately Ste began to feel the waves of comfort that seemed to flow from somewhere deep within the body of the boy in front of him. Looking up, Ste looked deep into Jamie’s eyes and saw a reflection of the fountain where the waves were coming from. It was so easy for him to let himself drift in that fountain forever but he was not sure if that was what he wanted.

“I don’t know, Jamie. I don’t know what to do next” Ste sighed as he released Jamie’s hands.

A sudden look of pain flashed across Jamie’s face as he felt his hands crashing down on the mattress. The night has been quite the emotional roller coaster for him and what they have been through up to that point has been more that he imagined would be possible. To take it further would be more than his fantasies came through but he began to doubt if he himself was ready for it. Jamie could not stop wondering if Ste was also ready for what would happen and how this might change them. It was one thing to dream about being together but do they have the courage to see it through? Unable to face Ste’s questioning eyes, Jamie slowly turned around and tried hard to banish the growing doubts.

“I’ll understand if you want to stop now Ste before we do anything we’ll regret later.” Jamie softly whispered as he tried his best to hide the hurt he felt inside.

Suddenly finding himself looking at Jamie’s back for the second time that night, Ste could not help but feel a sinking feeling in his heart. He was confused and scared of what he was thinking about. Everybody he knew told him that what he was feeling for Jamie was not right and that he was soiled for having such impure thoughts. His heart started to break at the thought of not having Jamie back in his arms and yet everything that he had been taught says that it was not right for a man to lie with another man. Slowly it began to get more difficult for him to breath as he felt his own heart being strangled by the dogma that clouded his mind. Shaking his head slowly to sweep away the doubts, Ste slowly lifted his arms to gentle pull Jamie back to face him.

“I know that we should stop Jamie but I don’t know if I want to. I’m not even sure if I can now, Jamie” Ste tried to calmly reassure Jamie as they eyes met.

Jamie searched deep into Ste’s eyes and found the turmoil that was being raged in Ste’s mind. It was no less than the one that was raging in his. Both were fighting years of indoctrination and no one knew if it was a battle that could be won. It was so easy for one of them to put a stop to this and agreed this night never happened. They could continue to live life as they were and never talk about what happened ever again. It was so easy but it was not something that Jamie wanted to do. It would just break his heart to see Ste again in the daylight and wonder about the what ifs if they were to stop now. Ste was right about one thing though. They have both opened a door and walked though it with the realization that they might not be able to return to where they were before.

The First Step To Start A New Journey

After years of thinking and talking about it, I finally signed up for a gym membership this past week. I’ve always put it off before both because of financial constraints and my own hesitance to work out in public. After my good year last year in terms of being able to actually lose weight at the end of the year instead of gaining weight like I usually do, I have to say that I feel motivated to lose even more weight and tone up my flabby physique hence my rationalization on why I need to start going to the gym now. I also can afford shedding more weight health-wise if I wanted to get my high blood pressure under control. As it is now, it is a surprise that I’m still able to function normally without having my head pop in a spray of blood every time I get stressed. I’m hoping that these benefits would be sufficient to push me to overcome my extreme reluctance of working out in public.

I actually did some weight training using free weights back when I was in college. It was quite fun in the beginning since I made new friends who shared the same interests of staying in shape. It didn’t hurt either that I was continuously surrounded with wall to wall eye candy/fantasy material to get me motivated to work harder to measure up. Unfortunately for me, I got too easily discouraged by the lack of progress I made compared to the other people that I trained with. After slacking too often on my training program, it felt easier to just drop it rather than pushing myself to reach the unrealistic goals that I set for myself. Add to the fact that I was inflicting more hurt than good by using the wrong techniques when training with free weights, it was just a matter of time before I felt that it was not turning out to be all that I hoped for. To this day, I still regret giving up so easily back then when I could have easily stuck with it and try to learn the right way of doing it. Things could have turned out differently had I felt more secure with how my body looked if I had just continued on then.

When I first started working at my current office, I also made use of the free gym facilities that they offer to the staff. At first it was all good since there were a bunch of us who would always make it a point to work out together after work. As time passed, one by one of my gym buddies started to skip our session till in the end it was just myself who continued on with the regular workout session. It was at that point when I started feeling self conscious about working out in public again. It also didn’t help that the gym equipment always had a long queue of people wanting to use it and that they only opened from 5 to 8 pm during the weekdays. Although the company did provide a person to man the gym during operating hours, that person’s responsibility was more to maintain the gym equipment rather than helping out on showing people how to use the equipment correctly. In the end, I was back to square one by working out blindly and disappointed at my lack of progress. The last straw that broke the deal was when they would only allow normal employees to use the gym at only particular days because they set aside the other days for closed gym sessions for management staff. Although that policy has been changed, I have not been back to the office gym since then.

I hope that I would have a totally different experience with this new gym that I’m joining. For one, I have to pay a monthly fee to use the gym so I know that I would be putting in more effort to make sure that I get my money’s worth. Not only do I have to fork out the monthly fee out of my own pockets but I also signed up for a one year commitment to stick with the gym membership so I know I will have at least that long to fully utilize their facilities. To doubly make sure that I maximize what ever gains that I hope to achieve this time around, I’ve also decided to sign up to work with a personal trainer for the first 3 months. It will cost me a bomb to have it but based on my own personal experiences, I would need someone to teach me how to use the equipment properly and to continue to motivate me until I feel confident enough that I can continue on by myself.

It took me 2 visit of the gym pre sales membership booth before I decide to sign up. I also checked with some of my friends who I know are gym goers about the pros and cons of the gym facilities as well as the price that they offered for my monthly fees. It took some wrangling but I managed to get the initial gym joining fee waived and only have to pay RM 115 to use the gym facilities monthly. Since the gym doesn’t start operating at Sunway Pyramid till July, I don’t need to start paying the dues till then which will allow me to start paying off my personal trainer fees which should be fully paid off by the time I start using the gym. That would at least help in terms of not being too much of a financial burden at this point. I guess it is too early to see how much this change would impact me but what I do know is that I’m terribly excited about the whole thing.

It’s hard to explain why that I’m so excited about such a trivial matter. Probably it is because this move represents a change that I really wanted at this point in my life. I’m really hoping that this early birthday present for myself would pay back in dividends later.

Manila Trip '07 - Wheels In Motion

In about 2 weeks time, I hope to be on my way to Manila for the first time in my life and I have to be honest that I’m really excited about it.

It all started sometime back in November last year when a bunch of my secondary school alumni boys proposed an overseas trip. They decide to pick Manila as the trip destination and those who were interested to go would have to sign up to be included in the tour group. The prospect of going to Manila was really appealing to me since I have never been to any part of the Philippines. Having not been on a trip overseas since my last company business trip to Singapore, the idea of flying off to a far away destination became something that I hardly resist.

Those who were joining the trip had to pay for their own way which breaks down to return flight ticket, accommodations, food and other incidentals. Since we planned the trip so far in advance, we were able to get a pretty good deal from Air Asia for the return flight tickets. At RM 130 for the return tickets, it was a deal hard to beat although it was strange for me to buy tickets that cost less than the taxes they slapped on it. The total cost for the air fare came down to RM 353 excluding the Philippines airport tax that we have to pay when leaving the country. All in all, I set aside about RM 500 for the air fare from the total budget.

As for accommodation, we all made reservations at the Palm Plaza Hotel in Malate district in Manila. From what I was able to look up in the Net, it is suppose to be a businessman’s boutique hotel which means that it would be surrounded by a healthy spread of nightlife offerings. At least that’s what I understand when they say that they cater mainly for traveling businessman. Hopefully I would get a chance to enjoy it and continue to stay substance free for the trip. I’m sure the temptation would be greater there since I almost have never went out KL pub crawling since I stopped smoking and drinking. I really don’t want to fall off the wagon after all I went through to stay clean and sober. I think that I just have to play it by ear once I get there and double check myself if it’s worth succumbing to the temptation when it arises.

Speaking of temptation, I don’t know if I would be able to get to check out the alternative, as in not exclusively hetro-inclined, scene in Manila. Since the trip seems to be turning into a boys weekend away from the women-folk, I am fairly certain that a visit to a seedy strip joint would be in the plans some how. As much as I might enjoy the excursion, it wouldn’t be exactly the same for me. I guess that I could take a chance and slip out on my own and venture for to see the scene for myself but who am I kidding? For one, I would not want them to find out about my predilection if I got caught. Furthermore if I don’t have the balls to go to any of the gay bars in KL, what makes me think that I would have any to go to one alone in Manila where I don’t have any of my support structures in place? So a walk on the wild side in Manila for me looks very doubtful at this point.

Hopefully that would leave me with more money for food and incidentals. After RM 500 for the airfare and airport taxes and another RM 600 for 3 night’s stay at the hotel, I will be setting aside RM 2000 for the rest of my expenses there. I pray to God that I won’t be spending that much while I’m there since there are better things that I can use the money for. I just have this overwhelming fear of being stranded in a foreign place without enough money to get home which explains my irrational need to carry this much money on this trip. I’m fairly sure that I would be able to keep to a fairly balanced expenditure sheet seeing that food is suppose to be priced fairly reasonable in Manila and I’ve been told that there isn’t really much to shop for other than the locally made mementos there to bring back home. Other than my customary travel gifts that I would usually buy for my family and a few selected friends, I don’t think that I would be on a major spending spree while I’m there.

I wouldn’t be surprised if it turned out that I spent more leading to the trip then when I’m there. As latest count, I already had to shell out money for my passport renewal and a new pair of jeans which I truthfully need since I already wore out my last one until it was threadbare in the crotch area just waiting for an unsightly accident to happen. I even went as far as buying the male equivalent of a little black dress! I don’t know what drove me to actually buy it. I admit that the black with blue striped shirt does cut a fairly flattering silhouette on me now that I lost all the weight that I carried before. I must also admit that it does make me feel a bit saucy when I wear it but seriously I don’t know it I would ever be able to bring myself to put it on and go out in public. I’ve bought it on impulse and now it is sitting there making me feel intimidated. Does anyone else in their right mind would feel the same way?

I guess that I could con one of my friends to let me tag along when they go out to clubs and I finally find the courage to wear my little black shirt.

A Night To Remember - Part 2

Read - Part 1

In the short moment that it took for Ste to debate his options, Jamie’s eyes clouded again with fresh tears. Ste took in a deep breath and let himself carried by the flow of the moment. His heart had never led him astray before and he hoped that it would not do so tonight. Gently he lifted Jamie’s head again and pressed his lips softly to Jamie’s.

When his lips touched Jamie’s soft lips, the familiar tingle that he felt before started to shoot up his spine. Unknowingly, Ste held his breath for fear that even the passage of air though his body would chase away this wonderful sensation. The pressure of the kiss became stronger as Ste let go of the last of his doubts and focused on thoughts of gratitude for Jamie’s tears. A calmness settled over him as Ste realized that he would never want this feeling to ever go away. Slowly his arm rose to encircle Jamie and pull him close to Ste’s body. Ste wanted to feel the warmth that was pouring out of Jamie’s heart on his skin.

Through the mist of sadness, Jamie’s mind snapped to attention at the contact of Ste’s lips. Every single conscious thought in his mind was suddenly exiled and left him with the just the physical sensation of the kiss. Jamie was not aware that had stopped breathing when Ste put his soft lips on his. A sudden explosion of colours threaten to overwhelm his mind as he felt the kiss became more insistent. A deep moan began to vibrate in the back of his throat as Jamie’s body started to relax at the comforting sensations of Ste’s arms pulling him close to his body. The flow of tears that threaten to drown his heart with sorrow had stop as suddenly as it came before.

Without him knowing it, Ste’s tongue stirred into a life of it’s own. It began to trace the ridges of Jamie’s teeth hesitantly asking permission to find it’s soft counterpart. Sensing the unspoken request, Jamie slightly parted the pearly gates that guarded his own tongue and beckon a silent welcome. When the tips of the two meet, a sudden jolt of electricity rushed through their nerve endings toward the two unprepared brains the result of which broke contact between the two soft lips. Ste and Jamie looked at each other in disbelieve while gasping for air that their starved lungs demanded.

“Did you feel that too?” Ste blurted out as soon as he had enough breath to form the words to his question.

Jamie’s face was flushed with surprised and excitement. “Yeah! What was that?” he said panting to find his breath.

Ste shyly looked at Jamie’s equally surprised expression. “I don’t know what it was but … My God!” his voice trailed off as he tried find the words to express the sensation. “Wanna find out?” Ste breathlessly asked with a cheeky grin on his face. Jamie could do nothing other than nod at the offer before their lips meet again to find the source of the wonderful feeling that they both just experienced.

With tentative steps, the two young adventurers retrace their path that led to that wondrous place that they glimpsed so briefly before. Both were silently amazed at how easy it was to find themselves standing again upon the gates of the same moment that overwhelmed their inexperienced senses. It was as if they were born for this journey and that every fibre of their being were created to find themselves in this moment. As time seemed to slow around them, they found themselves right back where they had parted moments before.

As soon as the tips of their tongue met, the now familiar spark seemed to jump from one to the other electrifying their senses. Having felt the spark before, the two minds steeled themselves against the breath taking sensations and were immediately rewarded with a wave of calmness that washed away all doubt that this was where they were meant to be. No longer were there conscious thoughts crowding away the sensations that came in soft waves over the two. Both reacting to the other without realising that they did not need to know what the other was asking. For a moment they found themselves in a familiar place that they never knew they’ve been before.

Their gentle exploration that began tentatively continued as time seemed to stop to worship the moment. Little by little instincts began to guide the two young boys through the motions that both never imagine finding themselves in. Ste’s hand began to softly trace the ridges of Jamie’s spine causing a slight shudder to run in the direction of his hands. Unknowingly, Jamie’s hands slipped gently under Ste’s T-shirt and started to stroke the sides of the boy in front of him ever so gently.

The sensations of Jamie’s soft hands gently warming his sides, Ste began to slip his free hand under Jamie’s T-shirt. Pausing for a moment to savour the soft skin of Jamie’s firming belly, Ste’s hands began to inch closer upwards towards Jamie’s unmoving chest. As Ste’s hands softly settled on Jamie’s chest, his beating heart began to race as he starts to feel the thumping of Jamie’s racing heart. The thumping became much faster as Ste began to slowly trace loving circle on the soft expanse of Jamie’s chest. Losing control of his limbs, Jamie unknowingly began to squeeze Ste’s side harder.

“Ouch!” Ste suddenly sat up straight and winced at the sudden sharp pain at his sides.

Jamie quickly lifted his hands from Ste’s side on hearing Ste’s pain. As he tried to extricate himself from Ste’s T-shirt, Jamie began to lose his balance and started to fall backwards taking Ste with him. As he was pulled forwards, Ste’s elbow dipped lower and accidentally hit Jamie’s groin area. Wholly surprised by the sudden pressure, Jamie began to cry out in pain only to be quickly cut off by Ste’s lips sealing his and stealing away the surprised yelp. Soon the lips began to muffle childish giggling that started to raise up deep within both boys. As Ste slowly lifted his lips from Jamie’s, he saw himself reflected in Jamie’s eyes. For one moment, they both share the same expression of trying their best to not break up laughing at their situation.

“You’re going to cut off my circulation if you don’t move your elbow, Ste” Jamie said as he valiantly tried to keep a straight face.

“Serves you right for squeezing me too tight!” Ste’s countered playfully and cheekily rubbed his elbow at Jamie’s groin.

A soft gasp for air escaped Jamie’s lungs as he felt the stirring in his groin responding to Ste’s uncharacteristic closeness. “You sure you want your elbow to be where it is right now, Ste?” Jamie breathlessly whispered to Ste and coyly fluttered his eye lids like many of the old time starlets that he saw on those old movies on telly.

Ste arched his eyebrows in surprise at Jamie’s behaviour for a moment before looking down and realising where his elbow was pressing. In an instant, his faced blushed the reddest shade of red imaginable as the realization of what had happened finally dawned to him. He quickly moved his elbow away and tried to be nonchalant about his predicament. He shyly turn to face Jamie and found himself looking at the widest smile that he ever saw on another person. Jamie’s grin was so infectious that Ste could not help himself from breaking into a grin that mirrored the one he was seeing himself.

“Why, thank you Master Steven. I finally have control of all my faculties” Jamie playfully pushed Ste up while still grinning from ear to ear.

Trying hard to contain his laughter, Ste was only able to blurt out the first comeback that came to his mind. “Silly git!” he whispered softly as he moved away slowly from Jamie’s warm arms.

“That’s Mr. Silly Git to you.” Jamie said with a naughty twinkle in his eyes.

“Alright then Mr. Silly Git. What do we do now?” Ste valiantly trying to be serious despite the small giggles that he was trying to contain.

Ever playing the role of the movie starlet, Jamie began to luxuriously stretch out across the bed as if to loosen every taut fibre of his being after the wonderful assault to his senses. “Don’t really know actually. It’s not like it’s something that they teach in school, innit?” Jamie said as he shyly glanced at the boy hovering in the field of vision in front of him.

Ste immediately stopped giggling as he began to weigh Jamie’s words. He never thought of how far he wanted to take this new experience. Being able to touch another and be touched without the fear of being hurt was an intoxicating experience. Kissing Jamie came surprisingly easy despite the fact that he was kissing another boy. He has kissed other people, all of them girls, but this time was different. There were no clumsy motions to go through. With Jamie, it came naturally. No thoughts of trying to figure out how to do it right. No pressure on him to impress Jamie with any fancy kissing technique. With Jamie it was as if that perfect kissed was there all along waiting for this night to blossom. But a kiss was miles away from the next step that Jamie might be thinking about if Ste was reading him right. Ste paused a moment to consider what would be his next step.

(to be continued)

Stray thoughts

"When it is not dark enough, you can’t see the stars."

I got this from a fellow blogger’s blog site and I have not been able to get it out of my mind since morning. The sentiments behind the words are so simple but at times when the thought is most needed seems to be the most difficult to grasp. More often than not, when one finds themselves in a dark place of their lives it’s really hard to realize that things don’t stay dark forever. Worst part of the experience is that the feeling that you are all alone in what you have to go through.

Looking back on my own experiences, there has been more than a few dark times in my life. Some I got through by sheer preservation and honestly some I never really knew how I managed to survive through it. I guess copious amount of mind altering substances might have had a hand in me getting through those that I don’t remember. Good thing that I got wise to the fact that in the end I had to get myself through the dark times without chemical influence if I really wanted to have a lasting resolution to my problems. I shudder to think how I might have ended up today as if I had not learnt that lesson when I did.

Having friends around you when you are going through the darkest times of your life is something that I have always been thankful for. Somehow I have been fortunate enough to always been able to find a sympathetic ear to bend even when I thought that I was at my loneliest. Because of that I have always believe in never declining to be a shoulder to turn to in times of trouble to any of my friends. Of course this has led to some problems in some occasions especially when it involves me being in the middle of feuding couples which makes me a bit hesitant in my later years to offer advise on the subject of relationships. What I do now is more to cheer them up so they could at least have some respite to collect their thoughts. If they are in their darkest place, I hope that I could be a bright point in the sky for them to look forward to.

As I sit now at home away from the office recovering from a mild case of food poisoning and feeling a bit pensive despite the bright sunny day outside, I still have the simple sentiments that I started this entry with on my mind. It is when it is darkest that the sky really lights up. One only need to remember to look up to be able to appreciate it then. No matter how low you feel at that particular moment, it only takes a gaze to see that there is something better waiting for you to reach out to.

Hence my favorite thing to say when I feel down …

Buck up ‘lil camper.

It's Time To Change

Long time readers of my blog and those who know me personally outside on this space know full well my issues with my personal appearance. No matter how much people try to convince me that I don’t look half bad relative to the trolls that roam the dark backrooms in KL, I still have to physically restrain myself from breaking each mirror every time I catch my own reflection in them. In my mind’s eye, I can’t lose enough weight fast enough for me to be comfortable in my own body. It got worse as I grew older and start yearning for physical intimacies because I could not bring myself to take my clothes off in front of another person no matter how much I wanted to. If I can’t bear looking at myself unclothed in front of the mirror without feeling disgusted, how can I expect another to not have the same disgust when they look at me?

Fortunately for me and my sanity, I like to think that there is still hope. 2006 turned out to be the first time that my yearly resolution to lose weight really got accomplished. I started 2006 weighing 89kg and by the time 2007 rolled around, I had lost 9 kg and at least 2 waistband size. I think that I managed to do this by changing my eating habits … eating half the portions size that I used to, eating better food and cutting out as much junk from my diet as my cravings can let me. Somehow I tapped into the same willpower that have helped me to be successfully nicotine free for the last 3 years which still amazes me considering how much of a cigarette fiend I was back then. This well of willpower will be something that I would really need this coming year.

For 2007, I have made it a goal for me to lose even more weight than I did last year. I need to do this not only so that I can feel better about myself but also as a precautionary measure since I’m fairly sure that my previously diagnosed borderline hypertension would have been upgraded to full blown just-waiting-for-a-stroke-to-happen by now. At 33 (ok … 34 next month), it’s almost a sin not to take better care of yourself if one wanted to live out the remainder of your life in the best of health. I like to think that what I do now in terms of my health and well being at this point of my life will pay out in dividends when I turn 50 if I live that long that is.

To beat my previous record of losing 9kgs, I have decided to not only continue my existing dietary habits but to couple that with moderate workouts. Other than my daily 1 hour round trip walk to work, I haven’t really done much in terms of working out in the past year. If I could lose 9kgs just with my walks, just imagine how much more weight I could lose if I just got off my fat ass and start excising more. The thought was enough to get me to dust off my old neglected exercise machine and start using it again after years it sat rusting quietly in my storage room. I have only been using it about 30 minutes per session every other day for the past 2 weeks and was pleasantly surprised how much I feel that I could really get into this again. I did some free weights back when I was in college but never really stuck to it much to my disappointment now. I’m fairly sure that if I were to put in as much effort as I do in being substance free into working out, I would be able to meet my goal of achieving my optimum body weight. Hopefully by doing that, I would also be able to tone up my body so at least I will no longer have the urge to tempt 7 years of bad luck every time I see myself in the mirror.

There is a new gym opening up near my apartment that is having a pre-opening membership drive that I have been considering to sign up. I already have a free gym facility that I could go to at my workplace but I have been too self conscious to go to since everyone who goes to that gym know me from work. They also do not offer any trainers to help map out a workout plan in my office gym which I really need if I achieve my goals. The facilities being offered at this new gym looks promising as well as the classes that they offer free to members. The only drawback is that I have to sign up for a whole year membership contract for the first year before being able to opt out in the second year if I wanted to. At RM 115 per month, I’m not sure if it is considered a good value since I have never had to pay for gym membership before. I guess that I have to ask around some of my friends who I know are gym goers to see it the price seems reasonable. If it is, then is a good chance that I will treat myself to a gym membership this year.

If I do, I guess I’ll be shopping for a gym buddy as well to keep me motivated :-)

A Night To Remember - Part 1

Don't really know what to post about today but I felt that I need to keep this new motivation for blogging moving forward. I guess I should think about something to write about soon.

Anyway ... as part of my new resolve to start writing again, I would like to share some of the pieces that I did before back when I was just briming with creative juices. I was also inspired back then by Jonathan Harvey's "Beautiful Thing", a movie that is still close to my heart, when I wrote this original piece. For those who know the movie, this piece of fictional prose expands on what I think happens after the Peppermint lotion scene between Jamie and Ste in Jamie's beadroom. Some of us will of course know how the scene ends in the movie but for those who don't, "Beautiful Thing" is a movie really worth watching at least once in your life time so go find it to find out what happens in the movie.

I must warn you that this is the original unedited draft of the story so there are bound to be a lot of gramatical and word choice mistakes since I am my worst editor. I hope that it would not be too distracting when you read it.

Part 2 will be posted next week.

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A Night To Remember - Part 1

Jamie's mind was racing! "Shite! You're diving off the deep end now, Gangle" he thought.

After years of yearning for the boy next door, it had boiled down to this one moment. Just moments before he had done the impossible. He kissed Ste on the lips. Ste, the object of his fantasy and desires for all these years. Jamie had expected a fist to his face for taking advantage of Ste's emotional state but was surprised to find none. Ste's soulful eyes did not flamed with anger. Instead it reflected a longing that Jamie never imagined he would see outside the confines of the mirror that he himself looked into every day. Could this be true? Could he ever hope to imagine that Ste felt even the slightest bit of desire for him? Glancing back to those soulful eyes, Jamie tried to show his steely resolve and hoped that his expression would not betray him.

“Can I touch you?” Jamie said softly with pleading eyes that did indeed betrayed his resolve.

Ste tried valiantly not to show his obvious elation upon hearing Jamie’s request. He was still overcome by the soft feel of Jamie’s lips on his. The kiss only lasted a moment but it felt like a whole eternity to Ste. The soft lips left a tingle that Ste could not really comprehend. “Why do I feel this way? I’ve been kissed by another boy, for heaven’s sake. I should be disgusted but I’m not! ” Ste calmly thought to himself. For the first time he felt that here was someone who didn’t want to cause him hurt. It was a strange and confusing experience to feel another’s touch and not wanting to flee from it. As Ste looked into Jamie’s eyes, a feeling of absolute longing started to wash over him like a wave that washes away the foot prints that mar the beauty of an untouched beach.

Taking in a deep breath, Ste softly said “I’m a bit sore”.

“Yeah” Jamie answered softly. “Is this a denial or an invitation?” Jamie wondered silently. Hesitantly, he reached out to caress Ste’s face tenderly. Feather-light, his finger traced the soft curves of the face that has been so close and yet so far way from him for so long. Ste did not turn away from Jamie’s soft touch. He was still bewildered by the tenderness that he had thought that he would never experience again after the death of his mother so long ago. In a way, Jamie’s touch tonight reminded Ste of his mother. Jamie had the same look in his eyes as she did. The look of unconditional love given freely to another. There would be no questions asked and no demands requested for what was given tonight. “Am I ready for this? How far will this go?” Ste silently pondered.

As he looked into the twin brown pools of Ste’s eyes, Jamie’s fingers slowly begun their slow spiral downwards to Ste’s chest. Through the material of the T-shirt, Jamie felt that Ste was trembling ever so slightly. “There’s a slight wind blowing tonight but it’s not that cold. Why is Ste shivering?” Jamie winced internally. As sudden as the realisation came to him, it suddenly dawned to Jamie that Ste might have something else in his mind at that moment. “He’s disgusted! He thinks that I’m a dirty queer taking advantage of him! He’s shivering because he’s disgusted by my touch!” Jamie’s anguished thoughts screamed at him. Just as he was about to lift his hand from Ste’s chest, Ste moved his left arm over his head to allow more access to the soft fingers that were delicately tracing loving circles on his chest. An acceptance of the gift being given. A door of opportunity opening for Jamie. The circle begins again.

Conflicting thoughts were racing in Ste’s mind. “This is wrong! Why did you let Jamie touch you? You’re not queer! He says that it doesn’t matter but it matters to you!” his rational mind screamed. “Why should it matter? Deep down inside you’ve been dreaming of this. Face facts, you stupid git! How many times that you’ve prayed to have someone whose touch didn’t cause you pain. Jamie’s fingers are not hurting you! They’re showing you love. What else do you want?” Ste’s emotional side countered. The open warfare that raged between the rational and emotional sides caused Ste to shiver slightly. “I need this tonight! I’ll sort it out in the morning but tonight I need to know that I am loved by someone again” Ste concluded decisively. His emotional side had won the battle. Slowly he raised his arm out of the way to give Jamie permission to continue. A silent apology to Jamie for ever doubting his gift of love that has been missing from Ste’s life for so long.

“I’ll stop if you feel uncomfortable with this, Ste” Jamie’s soft whisper jolted Ste from his thoughts.

“No, Jamie. Please don’t stop what you’re doing. It’s OK with me, Jamie. It feels good actually” Ste blurted and quickly blushed in embarrassment at his over eagerness.

“Are you sure?” Jamie hesitantly looked into the eyes whose owners he had been worshipping from afar.

With a shy nod, Ste whispered softly “Yeah”.

With a shy smile, Jamie continued his gentle exploration for every inch of Ste’s chest. Through his T-shirt, Jamie sensed that Ste was becoming more relaxed at his touch. It was Jamie’s turn to shiver slightly at that thought. Here he was with his hands on the one person that ever mattered in his life other than his Mum. “I can’t believe that this is really happening to me.” Jamie’s mind racing at the thought. “Ste! In my bed! Me touching him! Showing him how much I loved him!” Jamie closed his eyes to concentrate all of his senses to the tips of his fingers as they made their deliberate journey around Ste’s chest. He has memorized the chest of the person beside him for so long that Jamie didn’t need to look at it to know all the soft curves, peaks and valleys. Every detail of Ste’s body was as familiar as his in his mind’s eye.

Taking in a deep breath, Ste shyly looked at this person who was showing him that another person’s touch can be comforting. “Jamie. The boy next door. Why didn’t I see it before?” Ste silently anguished. “I knew he liked me but I never dreamed that he fancied me as well. A good for nothing as Ronnie and Trevor would always remind me. I don’t deserve to find someone like this” his silent recriminations surfaced to remind Ste of who he was. As fast as the doubts came to mind, his body begun to banish them away as it started to respond to Jamie’s lingering touch. A blush crept steadily to colour his cheeks as Ste realised how his body was betraying him. He had yet to recover from the embarrassing reaction when Jamie rubbed the soothing lotion on his back and now his body was yet again announcing its delight at being this close to Jamie. Glancing at Jamie, Ste let out a soft sigh of relieve when he saw that Jamie had his eyes closed. “At least he won’t notice what his touch is doing to me.” Ste thought shyly. Closing his own eyes and smiling sheepishly, he thought “You’re a randy one, Steven Pearce! One touch and you’re about to climb the walls”. At that very moment, Ste was suddenly jolted from his thoughts by the sensations that quickly overwhelmed his brain. A sudden intake of breath was all that Ste could managed when he realised that Jamie’s fingers had brushed lightly over his nipple.

The sound of Ste being surprised was deafening to Jamie’s heighten senses. He quickly pulled his hand off Ste’s chest and looked at the angelic face beside him. Ste’s face was contorted in an expression that Jamie never saw before. “What have I done? Pain! Ste’s in pain! I’ve hurt him!” Jamie thought with a sudden tear escaping his eyes. Quickly sitting up, Jamie moved slightly away from Ste and looked away to hide the tears that begun streaming down his cheeks. “Bugger! I was too rough and touched where I shouldn’t. Tonight was meant to be special and I ended up hurting my poor Ste. My poor, lovely angel. I’m a clumsy fool who can’t even do this right” he chided himself for his own stupidity as the dam that was holding back his tears washed away.

“What was that!” Ste thought as he collected his wits after the onslaught of passion subsided. He never knew that a single touch could elicit such response from his body. For a moment he had felt that a universe of stars had exploded all at once behind his eyelids lighting up the dark corners of his soul with unimaginable brilliance. He was still trying to clear the spots from his eyes when he noticed that the loving touch that had sparked the fireworks of desire was no longer there. Suddenly Ste realised that felt alone again without the reassuring pressure of Jamie’s touch. A lump of sadness settled in his throat when he opened his eyes and saw Jamie sitting up and looking away from him. Jamie’s silhouette was framed by the soft moonlight that was coming in through the windows of Jamie’s bedroom and Ste could clearly see that his guardian angel’s body was shaking slightly. Slowly Ste raised himself off the bed and sat facing Jamie’s slightly shuddering back. Hesitantly, he raised his arm and placed his hand gently on the shoulders of the person who moments ago had open the door to a new dimension of emotions that Ste never knew existed with a single light brush of his fingertips.

“What’s wrong Jamie?” the concern in Ste’s soft whisper pierced the wall of sadness that surrounded Jamie.

Jamie did not turn around. His body shuddered with silent sobs. Ste’s soft voice did not console him this time as he realized that he was no better than Ronnie or Trevor for hurting Ste.

“Why are you crying, Jamie?” Ste’s voice came out more insistent that he had planned. He could not bear to listen to the soft sobs of the person who had only begun to show him how a touch doesn’t always mean pain. Jamie had stirred something deep inside him that he had thought that he had forgotten and now suddenly he felt much more alone than he had ever been before Jamie’s touch. The gaping hole of loneliness that Jamie left behind when he withdrew his hands threaten to engulf him. Ste was clinging to Jamie’s shoulders in hopes of a lifeline that would pull him to safety.

“I’ve hurt you! I was too rough!” Jamie managed to blurt out between the sobs that was welling up from his heaving heart.

“What?” Ste stammered as he blinked away the stray tear from his eyes on seeing his friend overwhelmed by a sadness that he didn’t understand.

“Your bruises! I didn’t mean to, Ste. I touched the bruise on your chest and that hurt you!” Jamie was inconsolable.

“Shite! He really thinks that he hurt me!” Ste suddenly realized the cause for Jamie’s sobbing. He had never thought that he would see the day that someone would actually cry for causing him pain. A silent thanks rang out from the deepest part of his soul to God for allowing him to find such a person when he himself had given up on the notion. Here, as he sat on Jamie’s bed, he finally found someone who would rather die than cause him even the slightest bit of discomfort. Wiping away the tear that rolled unconsciously down his cheek, Ste decided to make Jamie understand that he did not do anything wrong.

“Jamie. Please turn around.” Ste increased the pressure on Jamie’s shoulder in hopes that it would rouse him from his sadness and see the light of reason. Slowly he turned Jamie around to face him.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry …” Jamie kept repeating the same words over and over again as tears trickle down his downcast face.

Ste moved to put his hands on either side of Jamie’s head. “Shhh, stop crying, Jamie. Look up. Look at my face. Please!” Ste pleaded gently unsure of what to do to stop this flow of tears.

Jamie was still shaking with sobs as Ste gently lifted his face so that they can look into each other’s eyes. Jamie’s eyes were red with tears and puffy around the edges. Ste had a slight smile of gratitude on his face. “Those tears are for your pain, Steven Pearce. Cherish them as they are the first in a long time shed for your pain. Show him that he was never the cause of your pain tonight or on any night” his mind whispered softly. “But how?” Ste searched frantically for an answer. “You know how, Ste” a small unearthly whisper suddenly broke through the confusion in his mind.

(to be continued)

Looking forward for a good year

It’s strange really when the moment you thought that you have everything planned out then life throws you a curve ball and messes everything up. That’s the only excuse I can give for not updating this blog for the past 6 months.

I did honestly planned to recap the “One in A Million” show but when I started to miss watching the shows and repeats on their website, my interest in the whole endeavor quickly waned. Somehow it didn’t feel the same like when I recapped the whole season of MI2 … I was motivated then by the talents on the show but that motivation was strangely absent in the case of OIAM. In the end I decided to chuck the whole project out of the window instead of feeling guilty that I’m not putting an effort to recap episode after episode.

I also continued on my summer ’06 blockbuster movie watching spree but felt writing about them fairly pointless after a while. I fell into a writing rut that all I wanted to do was to just concentrate on my work and not dwell on how I was personally smothering my creative impulses. I became less guilty as the days went by for every entry that I didn’t write to the point that I simply didn’t care for it any more.

So … what’s changed?

For one … one of my new years resolution is to let my creative side more leeway to roam free. It has been a few years since I really produced something that I was really proud of both personally and professionally. I don’t want to continue feeling that I was just going with the flow and just letting things happen around me. It’s time for me to snap out of the general malaise that I have been wallowing lately and take back charge of my course yet to be navigated.

Writing is exactly the outlet I need to exercise my new found determination for change. There was a time that I could pour out my personal demons on printed word and not have them bottled up within to fester. I need to have that feeling of control again in my life. To that effect, I’ve decided to reactivate this blog as a way for me to keep myself in practice. I’ve also set myself two writing projects to be completed by the end of the year. One of them is the continuation of my previously abandoned collection of autobiographical stories from my experiences of studying in a boarding school and the other is a film screenplay adaptation of an original story written by a fellow blogger.

Will I be able to do it … heaven knows but I know that I will put in my best effort to try. I can’t ask more of myself than that. If I do then it would truly be a good year for me.

Men At Work

Site renovations in progress and I hope to get back to blogging fairly soon.

Part of my 2007 new years resolution.

Movie Review: The Omen

(poster courtesy of http://www.heedtheomen.com/)

I nearly got to watch this film on the 6th of June. I was near KLCC on an off-site meeting which ended early that day and thought of catching the movie since I have to go there anyway to catch the LRT back home. The thought of watching “The Omen” on 6/6/06 was quite novel and I found out that a lot of people think the same as well. The show that I wanted to watch that day was fully booked and I wasn’t keen on waiting for the next showing with my heavy laptop bag and whatnot. I decided then to go for an early dinner at KLCC instead and watch the movie on the weekend at my usual cinema where I’m almost certain able to get the seats that I like. In foresight, it would have been a little more exciting if I was able to watch this film on that particular date so I at least have something original from the film to talk about.

“The Omen” directed by John Moore is the second remake (the first being the waterlogged “Poseidon”) to come out of Hollywood this summer blockbuster season. With the exception of several minor additions and music score changes, this film is in essence a slavish replication of the original 1976 movie of the same name directed by Richard Donner. This film even reuses the original screenplay written by David Seltzer with uncredited revisions by Dan McDermot to less than effective impact compared to the original. While not as pointless as Gus Van Sant’s 1998 shot-for-shot recreation of “Psycho”, the film does still begs the question why it should be remade other than to capitalize on the calendar coincidence. There were too many times in the film that audiences who have seen the original will be left wondering why they paid money to watch something that they have seen done much better before.

As in the original film, “The Omen” begins when a high ranking US ambassador Robert Thorn (Liev Schreiber) cannot bear to tell his wife Kate (Julia Stiles) that her baby was stillborn so he accepts an offer made by a priest at the Italian hospital to secretly adopt an orphaned infant and pass him off as his true son. This seemingly benign act would later bring misfortune to all as the child, now called Damien (Seamus Davey-Fitzpatrick), seem to have a knack of causing those around him to die horrible deaths as he grows older. When their attentive nanny and a priest who tried to warn him about Damien’s true parentage dies in spectacular fashions, the father begin to realize that all is not as it seems with Damien. With the help of a doomed photo journalist, Robert races across Europe to find out the truth behind the deaths and the ominous happenings that surrounded his family. All his efforts would end up in vain when he discovers who Damien real father was and what they have planned for him. Unfortunately their plans would be fatally inconvenient for the Thorns now that they know who they were dealing with.

As mentioned before, “The Omen” is a remake of the original using the same script that was written for that 1976 movie. As such, almost all of the scenes and dialogues followed closely to what we have seen before. I can’t be sure if they used the same sets or locations from the original but I do have the sense that they may have used a close approximation of it. Unlike the earlier “Poseidon” remake, this film is true to the point of slavish in their recreation of the original film. There were a few new scenes added in this new remake in an attempt to differentiate itself from the original but they neither added anything new or exciting to what was already a warmed-over fare. The new opening scenes set in the Vatican actually undercut the story’s plot build up now that we know that the Anti-Christ was scheduled to be born in the first 5 minutes of the movie . The new dream sequence unimaginatively added used cheap scares and loud noises in hopes that it would jolt the fast becoming bored audience from their seats but added nothing more. The new additions, in short, were pointless and easily dispensed of without taking anything away from the experience.

Taking the reins from Gregory Peck and Lee Remick, both Schreiber and Stiles portrayal of the doomed parents pales in comparison. While he is a great actor in his own right, Schreiber’s constantly dark and brooding expression made his Robert Thorn too morally ambiguous. Audience of the original could easily understand Peck’s, an icon of the all-American fatherhood from his earlier movies, anguish when he found out that he had to kill his son to save the world but in this remake it was hard not to believe that Schreiber’s Robert would have the same difficulties in driving a knife into his son’s heart the moment he found out the truth about Damien. It also didn’t helped that Julia Stiles’ Katherine played out more like a helpless victim from the start instead of a mother gradually realizing that there was something horribly wrong with her son.

Fortunately, the supporting actors fared a little better than the main leads. Both Pete Postlethwaite and David Thewlis in their roles of the mad Father Brennan and the doomed photo journalist Keith Jennings managed to make the most of their limited screen time. I was quite a surprised to find their characters more memorable to me than the leads in this movie. Mia Farrow’s Mrs. Baylock, the replacement nanny from hell, came across as sickeningly sweet and patronizing which is a departure from the much more reserved and controlling approach that her predecessor used for her character. While it may not work in some of the scenes, the choice to depart from the original was a welcomed breath of fresh air in the whole déjà vu – ish experience.

One glaringly obvious item that made the original work better for me than this remake was how the character Damien was portrayed. Richard Donner was able to keep the audience hooked into his version of the movie by letting us come to the realization organically that not all is right with Damien. The audience are taken in by Harvey Stephens’ innocence and charm that it was hard to not to be horrified when we watch his gradual transformation from angelic to demonic. In contrast, Seamus Davey-Fitzpatrick’s Damien in this remake practically telegraphs diabolical evil by constantly scowling and glowering at everything he sees from start to finish. Unless this child actor was born pissed and had his features frozen in a perpetual scowl, there was no excuse for the director not to give this actor better directions on how the character should act.

There were more than a few occasions when I caught myself thinking about how bored I was while watching this movie. The movie came across too much like a pale imitation of the original and had too little to add to the experience. Having the film undercut it’s own plot build up with the new opening scene and the unrelenting creepy kid scowl at the audience did not helped to lessen the disappointment I got from having to pay to watch the film. It is very rare that I leave the cinema feeling like I just wasted nearly 2 hours of my life but that was exactly what I felt after watching this warm-over presentation.

Here we go again

(image courtesy of oneinamillion.bluehyppo.com)

This may be a bit late in coming but I was actually a bit hesitant to put in the effort to recap the show at first. After the debacle of last year’s MI finale (yes .. I’m still sore about the results), I wasn’t sure I was up to the challenge to recap another weekly popularity contest disguised as a show about the search of the next big name deserving of the one million ringgit prize money. I also missed the first episode of the East Malaysia auditions show so I thought that I would skip it this time.

Then I found out about the repeat shows being streamed on the web courtesy of the local ISP sponsor for the show.

Instead of having to furiously jot down notes during the show and scheduling my nightlife (what little I have) around a fixed TV slot so I can get my notes for weekly recaps, I can now actually watch the show at any time when it is convenient for me. I will have the ability to really scrutinize the performances and figure out what works and what doesn’t. At the very least, this time around, I would be more confident about what I’m jotting down in the recaps after getting more opportunities to review the performances.

With that said, I hope to start putting up my own take on 8TV’s “One in a Million” weekly fairly soon. I’ve watched the repeat shows on the web and the collection of talent that I’ve seen in the first 2 audition shows was also a factor in my decision to recap the show. There were more than a few diamonds in the rough here that might be worth following to see their progress in the show.

I hope to have my write-ups for both audition and 1st round eliminations up soon.

Update: I will be back dating my recap entries so I document when they actually first show the episodes but will provide the links to the entries here until I catch up to the latest episode.

Recap for KK auditions is located here.

Recap for KL audition and 1st Central Eliminations forthcoming soon.

Movie Review : X3: The Last Stand

(picture curtesy of www.x-menthelaststand.com)

After months of speculations and anticipation, I finally get to see the movie that I have been most looking forward to this summer blockbuster season. When I wrote about watching the trailers back in December and March, I also listed down a few spoiler-ish observations that was able to glean from the two trailers. Coming into the theater to watch this film, I was both excited and apprehensive to see how much I have speculated back then would actually come up on screen. While a lot of the things that I speculated did come up in the finished product, I was pleasantly surprised by the many other story twists that I would have never thought of unfolding as I watched the movie.

“X3: The Last Stand” is allegedly the last installment in the X-Men movie franchise. In this last installment of the mutant trilogy, our merry mutants have moved away from the mutant vs. mutant and human vs. mutant struggles we saw in the first 2 movies. Mutants seemed to be more visible after the end of the last movie and the US government even has a blue-furred mutant Dr. Hank McCoy/The Beast (Kelsey Grammer) on the Cabinet. Just as the world was beginning to look more like what Professor Xavier (Patrick Stewart) envisioned for his charges, the news of a cure that seemingly neutralizes the mutant gene in mutants is made public by a pharmaceutical company owned by Warren Worthington II (Michael Murphy). Worthington Sr. had invested his sizable fortune to find the cure after finding out that his only son, Warren Worthington III/Angel (Ben Foster), was a mutant with the ability to fly with his 16 feet long angelic-looking wings.

While the mutant cure is being promoted as a purely voluntary option for all mutants, Eric Lehnsherr/Magneto (Ian McKellen) sees it as just steps away from being something that is forced onto the mutant population by the fearful baseline humans. His fears would be later confirmed when they realized that the US army had been outfitted with cure-guns specially designed to administer the cure forcible to any mutant. In response, Magneto swiftly gathers like-minded mutants into an army opposed to the cure. At the core of his army is the new Brotherhood of Mutants consisting of Raven Darkholme/Mystique (Rebecca Romijn), John Allerdyce/Pyro (Aaron Stanford), Cain Marko/Juggernaut (Vinnie Jones), Callisto (Dania Ramirez), Jamie Madrox/Multiple Man (Eric Dane), Archlight (Omyhra Mota) and Quill (Ken Leung). Commanding legions of disfranchised mutants, the Brotherhood of Mutants seeks to destroy the cure at its source at any cost.

On the flip-side of the argument, the X-Men favors opening a dialogue with the authorities about the cure despite their own misgiving about their intentions. Ororo Munroe/Storm (Halle Berry) finds the mere idea that there was something to be cured in mutants morally reprehensible while Logan/Wolverine (Hugh Jackman) feels that it is up to the individual mutant to choose what is best for them. Marie/Rogue (Anna Paquin) sees the cure as a way for her to be able to finally physically touch her boyfriend Bobby Drake/Iceman (Shawn Ashmore) who seems to be getting closer to fellow teammate Kitty Pryde/Shadowcat (Ellen Page). When The Beast resigns from his position in the cabinet over differences with the administration on the issue of the cure, he rejoins the X-Men and adds his considerable skills alongside the strongman Peter Rasputin/Colossus (Daniel Cudmore). The team will have to rise to the occasion when they have to try to stop Magneto and his army when they come to destroy the cure at the source.

While both side of the conflict begin to assemble their forces, Jean Grey/Phoenix (Famke Janssen) returns seemingly from her death at Alkali Lake as shown at the end of the last installment. Her return bodes ill fortune for her grieving boyfriend Scott Summers/Cyclops (James Marsden) who gave up leadership of the X-Men after her death. Resurrected with vastly greater levels of telekinetic and telepathic powers, Phoenix becomes Magneto’s most powerful ally when he decides to raid Alcatraz Island where Worthington Pharmaceuticals is developing the mutant cure from the genetic material they harvested from an imprisoned young mutant Jimmy/Leech (Cameron Bright) who has the ability to temporarily suppress any mutant power within a certain radius. The final climatic battle would leave a lasting impact to all involved and would irreversibly change the X-Men forever when they have to face the ultimate sacrifice that they have to undertake.

If all of this seems a lot to be happening in a movie, it is because it is. Story threads from the previous 2 installment make their appearance here to be tied up by the end of the 105 minutes. Add to that, the new storylines that appear here, the combination of these plotlines at times seemed too rushed and unsatisfying. Unlike the previous two films, the newly introduced mutants have little exposure time to allow the viewer to really know them. This was true for the new mutants on both sides of the conflict. Angel was hardly an X-Men in any sense compared to Nightcrawler at the end of the last film and if you’ve seen Archlight’s display of power in the trailers then you’ve already watched everything that she does in this movie. I would have liked to see more character beats in the film for them to shine and be memorable. I guess that part of the problem is that there were too many mutants running around in this movie for director, Brett Ratner and the screenplay writers team of Simon Kinberg and Zak Penn, to keep track. In this regards, Bryan Singer’s skill at juggling multiple character development as seen in the last 2 installment was sorely missed.

As a fan and long-time reader of the X-Men comics, the movie has it’s high and low points. I have to say that I was absolutely thrilled at seeing the Danger Room session and the famous “Fastball Special” maneuver which incidentally looks more like a hammer throw rather than a fastball pitch. Seeing it on screen is akin to hearing Human Torch shouting “Flame On!” in the Fantastic Four film for a fanboy. I was even more excited at the prospect of see the Sentinel on screen but alas they only gave us a severed Sentinel head instead. After being disappointed by the lack of the mutant-hunting robot, I was further disappointed by the lack of Phoenix-effect that we say at the end of the last movie when Jean Grey was resurrected. Most of the time the Dark Phoenix seemed to be channeling either Carrie or Gollum when she used her powers. Fortunately for the character, I have no problems with their explanations on how Jean Grey turned to the Dark Phoenix. That particular character development arch felt very organic and in line with the more “real world” feel of the movies compared to the comics.

Acting-wise, I have to say that this latest installment of the X-Men franchise is a mix bag. I was fairly concerned about how Beast would come off but after watching the movie, aside from the hit and miss makeup job, Kelsey Grammer did an acceptable job with the character. Standouts from the movie would be the usually suspects from the previous installments with special mention for Famke Janssen chilling portrayal of the Dark Phoenix. As I mentioned before, the newly introduced mutants this time around got the short stick in this deal. We hardly get to see Colossus in action when a scene where he goes toe to toe with the Juggernaut would have been very much welcomed. Ben Foster’s character, Angel, had all the build up but in the end was let down by disappointing pay-off. Most of the mutants on the Brotherhood side fare no better when their combine powers could be more dramatic in the hands of people who know the characters better.

If this movie was to be the last of the franchise, I have to admit to being sad as it closes the trilogy with a whimper instead of the bang that I expected. After the momentum of the first 2 films, especially the much superior X2 : X-Men United, it was slightly disheartening to see it falter at the finish line. I sincerely hope that I am wrong in this regards and that a future expanded and restored version will be released in DVD form to correct this oversight. I do believe that there is an extended version out there as the film felt too short and rushed through the editing process. Despite all indications based on what the audiences saw in the closing credits, I am not putting too much hope that they will revive the franchise with these group of characters. It would be a bonus if they did but if the don’t then I will be looking forward to the characters spin-offs rumored to be in development. I wouldn’t mind watching a film about the young students at X-Academy dealing with the mutant powers for the first time.

X3 : The Last Stand was not all bad. It fulfilled all the requirements of a summer action movie admirably and it had a fairly thought-provoking storyline. The movie also boast the highest casualty body count in the franchise including several major characters which I admit took me by surprised. The action scenes were sufficiently grand in scope and execution to sustain interest although I would have liked to see more heart in the movie based on a comic that has always been known for angst. If one was willing to over look several glaring plot holes when the characters choose to ignore the more logical approach in favor for the more “showy” action then this film then this can be an exciting movie to spend the afternoon at. Long time comic fans may continue to debate about how successful the movie was but personally I felt that much more could have been done to make this last installment better. There was so much potential here that ended up unrealized at the end.

Movie Review : The DaVinci Code

(picture curtesy of TheDaVinci Code.com)

Dan Brown’s “The DaVinci Code” was one of those books that I actually managed to finish within a single sitting. From the first moment that I opened the cover, I was instantly hooked in by the fast paced plot and interesting premise. It also didn’t hurt that the short chapters in the book had a cinematic feel to it that made it easy to visualize the story in a visual medium. When it was announce that a feature film was being released based on the novel, I already had my own expectations of what the movie could be like based on my earlier read. As I entered the cinema to watch the “The DaVinci Code”, I was anxious to see how closely my expectations was with the actual product directed by Ron Howard.

In “The DaVinci Code”, Tom Hanks plays the role of Robert Langdon, a Harvard symbologist, who was in Paris delivering a lecture when he becomes embroiled in a murder investigation headed by Inspector Fache (Jean Reno). The victim of the murder, Louvre museum curator Jacques Sauniere (Jean-Pierre Marielle), was found with symbols drawn all over his body by himself as he bled to death after being shot by a hooded albino monk Silas (Paul Bettany). What Langdon didn’t know was that one of the messages that Sauniere left behind was his name which Fache took as a clue as to the identity of the curator’s killer.

Enter Sophie Neveu (Audrey Tautou), a cryptologist for the French police and later revealed as Sauniere’s granddaughter, who warns Langdon of Fache’s intentions. After out-witting the inspector and his team of police personnel, Langdon and Sophie started to try to figure out the message that was left by the dead curator for both of them. The message they receive starts them in a journey to decipher clues that would explain why Sophie’s grandfather was killed. Their journey takes them from the bowels of the Denon Wing of the Louvre, to a local office of the Swiss Bank then to the French country side followed then by a visit to London before ending at the Rosslyn Chapel in Scotland within a 24 hour period.

Along the way, the pair also picked up Sir Leigh Teabing (Ian McKellen) to assist them to uncover the truth surrounding the Holy Grail whose secret Sauniere died to protect. As the trio traveled to escape an unrelenting Fache, they were also pursued by the murderous monk, Silas, on the orders of Bishop Aringarosa (Alfred Molina) who is trying to destroy everything linked to the secret that was being unraveled with the first murder. After a fair amount of twist and turns in the story, the real truth regarding the secret that Sauniere died to protect was finally revealed and justice summarily meted out to those who deserve it.

Working from a literal adapted screenplay written by Akiva Goldsman, Ron Howard’s “The DaVinci Code” stayed mostly true to Dan Brown’s source material. Other than minor changes to some of the characters, the film follows the original book almost religiously to an extent. Unfortunately for this movie, what worked magically on the printed medium seems to be lost in this meandering adaptation. The film did not successfully convey the sense of urgency and desperation that made the original novel such a page turner. While the movie doesn’t actually grinds to a halt at the more slower scenes but it did feel that the movie would be better served by adding a little more sense of urgency in it. There were point in the movie that you really feel the 140 minutes running time for this movie.

The normally brilliant Tom Hanks seems to be woefully miscast in the role Robert Langdon. His portrayal of the character came off too clinical and measured that made the character less engaging for the audience to invest their time empathizing with his plight. The painfully glaring omission of any explanation for the character’s motivation also helped little to build a character that the audience can identify with. This was true not only for Tom Hanks character but also the other characters in this movie. By glossing over the character motivations that made these characters so alive in the printed medium, the audience were left with fairly uninteresting and superficial copies. Fortunately for us, Ian McKellen’s wonderfully proficient portrayal of Sir Leigh Teabing saves audiences from falling asleep too deeply mid way into the movie. Applying the “playfully-eccentric-but-with-great-power” acting method that he perfected while playing Gandalf in the Lord of The Rings trilogy, Sir Leigh Teabing becomes the most memorable character in this movie that doesn’t have to strip naked and flog himself with a whip for penance.

“The DaVinci Code” is by no means a total failure. The film was an involved and engaging story especially to those who might have not read the original book. Those who have set their own expectations based on their own reading of the book might find themselves disappointed if not outraged by the lack of the sense of urgency and human failings that made the original a true page turner. Too many of the characters were portrayed without the character motivations that would help them come alive on screen. The decision to gloss over such an important character component was strange choice to make given the ample opportunities that the 148 minutes running time gave them to develop these characters. In the end we are left with a serviceable summer blockbuster release that I felt full of unfulfilled promises and unrealized potential.

One in a Million 01- 01, Airdate: 26/05/2006 – KK Auditions: East side is da best

(image courtesy of oneinamillion.bluehyppo.com)

Unlike last year, the end of American Idol on our local TV this year is not followed with the local Malaysian Idol competition. I guess that they had a really hard time trying to sell last year’s winner to the local public and could not make back what they had to pay to use the franchise name locally. So instead of Malaysia Idol, we get “One In A Million” which is clearly a thinly veiled attempt at having another go at the talent based reality show that have been proven as popular with the local viewers. The competition format looks to be much of the same thing but instead of a promised recording contract as a prize at the end of the competition, the winner of OiaM will get a RM1 million prize to be used studio time to develop their own album as well as to pay for the marketing of said album. They also say that the winner has an option to keep all the cash for themselves but I doubt that the producers of the show will allow it.

Like it’s discarded cousin, OiaM starts off with public auditions to select those who have the talent to go on to the Central Elimination round in KL. This time around, the auditions will only be held in Kota Kinabalu for the East Malaysian folks and in Kuala Lumpur for folks from the Peninsular. Those who came for these auditions had to go through the normal registration process before being herded into the waiting area while waiting for their turn to audition in front of 2 judges. Returning from his stint in MI is Paul Moss who seems to continue his role as the caustic judge of the bunch although this year he seem to have some competition in terms of snarkiness from Syafinaz who is the second judge on the show. I guess it would be interesting to see if a competition will develop between them to see which judge can reduce a grown person to a pool of tears the fastest on this show in the coming weeks.

Host duties for this show this year are taken by Awal Ashaari and Marion Caunter. They flipped languages this year with the male host taking up the running BM commentary while the female host doing the same in English. Marion definitely seems up to the job with her being from the 8TV late night Quickie segment but I have not seen Awal’s hosting skills yet. Personally I’m finding that Awal is a poor substitute to Jien who hosted the previous to Malaysian Idol seasons. It’s hard for me not to find him irritating the moment he starts to talk. I don’t know if it is just the voice or the childish antics that I find more grating with this male host. Hopefully I will be able to learn to tune him out in the coming weeks if he doesn’t get better in his hosting skills.

I have to point out that it was very meta of the producers of the show to start off the first show of the season with a clear statement of who/what they were not looking for at the end of the show. The first audition they show on this show was by a unassuming guy who did a very flat impression of a fan-favorite winner of the other talent-based reality show last year. His performance was almost immediately slapped down by the two judges who tells him that they were looking for originality and not someone doing an impression of the winner of that other show which incidentally rolled over last year’s MI many times over in terms of ratings. I guess someone was still sore that they can’t sell the CDs they made off last year’s MI winner.

Next up was a shy-looking girl in a tudung who told the judges that we will be singing a rock song by Amy Search. I have to admit that I was rooting for her up to the point she opened her mouth and the ear shattering shrieking started. It was as if she was calling all the denizens of purgatory to rise up and smite the judges where they sit. Thankfully it ended shortly before either one of the judge’s head exploded from her singing. After peeling myself from the sofa I was sitting from, I wondered if this was the type of auditions that they were going to be showing on the show tonight.

I should have know that the previous contestants was just the start of a whole string of bad audition clips coming up. There was a rather sad Robbie Williams wannabe butchering one of his songs in the auditions, another who would easily poke someone’s eyes out with his karate chop dance moves and many, many more bad auditions. While this was happening I was thinking that the producers should have learnt their lesson from last year in the MI audition episodes. Bad auditions are only funny when they are shown in small manageable doses after which they just become sad to watch. Even Paul Moss had enough and pulled a walkout ala Simon from American Idol this year although I guess that someone didn’t tell him that according to the script, he was not suppose to return to the judging area till the next day. Probably he came back because there is one less judge in OiaM compared to AI and he risked getting only the contestants that Syafinaz liked get through. Either that or it’s in his contract that he can only copy Simon up to a certain limit.

The first “good” audition highlighted this episode is by Khairul who wants to use the RM 1 million to collaborate with Steven Tyler from Aerosmith for his album if he wins. I doubt that the prize money would be enough for that but that’s his dream and he is entitled to it. The audition was fairly good as he has a solid rocker voice that sounded confident but it seems to me that he was the first good audition that Paul had seen that day. Both judges gave their approval for Khairul to go to the next round.

Next up was Ayu in the spotlight that highlights her current living arrangement in the boondocks of Sabah. While she is not the most commercial looking of the contestants, she really has a big voice that belies her small frame. Her voice sounded clear and has some weight powering the big notes. Those who know me know that I am a sucker for big voices so her audition pleased me. Hers was the type of auditions that make one wonder how many more untapped talent are languishing out there in obscurity. Both judges unanimously let her through and she will be definitely one of the contestants that I will be watching out for in the next round.

Unlike in MI, contestants who can play a musical instrument are encouraged to audition with them. Other than the possible comfort factor, I don’t see how accompanying yourself with a guitar would help make the auditions better. Case in point was the next contestants, Jorge, who doesn’t come-off as the type that the producers of this show are looking for. His vocals skills from the audition had a really raw quality that might not be able to be refined in time within the competition. I would have picked him as one of the auditions that the judges would pass over but I guess there was something that they saw in Jorge since they let him through although not before the following quip :

Syafinaz : So difficult to say yes.
Paul (deadpan) : Yeah. I know. That’s why you’re still single.

ZING!!! Of course Syafinaz could only throw daggers at Paul with her eyes while he just smirks there. Just one of the more memorable moments from the hour long internet repeat show.

Next up was a girl who worked in a moneylender office which was not clearly identified in her segment so I didn’t really caught her name. She sang her own song for the audition and her husky voice had some rough qualities that could use some polish to it. What made her audition memorable was her last minute wavering on the reason why she wanted to be in the competition. When she declared that she would rather be a song-writer rather than a singer, I thought that both judge’s head was going to explode. She was so nonchalant about it, I wasn’t sure if it was just nerves or she was just blur in what she was suppose to be doing in the audition. Her post audition comments didn’t really help to explain her behavior but the judges still let her through when she came back in. Personally, I would just cut my losses and not let her through until she figures out what she really wants to do.

Next contestant reminds me of those auditions that might be entertaining the first time you see it but gets old really fast. Carpet Guy doesn’t have the best voice or the skills for this competitions. What little vocal talent he has seems to be buried under the supposedly amusing dance moves that he pulled during the audition. The judges seemed to be thoroughly amused by this that they let the guy through although I doubt that he would make it further with his funny dancing when push comes to shove. It was also hard to figure out if the judges were laughing with him or at him.

Next segment showcased potential contestants coming into the audition singing songs by Atama who was a local hip-hop artiste in Sabah to varying degrees of success. When the real deal himself comes into the audition room, the audience was shown a fairly lackluster performance from the original artiste. While the rapping was fairly consistent and clear, it lacked the attitude and confidence that I would expect from a published artiste singing their own work. The second song that he sang was no different in terms of energy and presentation. Paul goes as far as to tell him that he would be OK as a backup singer but not the main act. It wasn’t a very confidently delivered performance.

Reminiscent of AI, OiaM also has it’s own best friend team coming to the auditions together to try their luck. Best friends, Errol and Gary, wanted to change their lives and saw the competition as a way to do it. Their life story as they told it reminded me of something that I would see from one of those HK “Young and Dangerous” films so the name “Hongkie Twins” almost immediately cross my mind when I heard their auditions. Both sang Cantonese songs which I can’t comment about the song selection but both delivered it fairly competently. Both got through to the next round so we will be seeing them again in the Central Eliminations round.

They showed a bunch of auditions by people who were placed into the maybe group. As the judges explained it, the maybe group consisted of potential contestants whom the judges see some potential but we either too nervous or picked the wrong song for their auditions. These contestants were asked to come back more prepared for a second chance at their auditions. I don’t think that they had the call backs at the end of every day since they were there multiple days for the auditions and they only had 8 callbacks. While some took the opportunity to improve, those who were not picked to continue on simply didn’t have the quality of vocals that the producers of the show are looking for. From the 8 callbacks, only 6 made it through which made the total number going through from the East Malaysian audition round at 31 contestants.

Next recap: 2nd Audition round in KL.

Movie Review: Poseidon

(picture curtesy of http://www.poseidonmovie.com/)

I think that I can vaguely remember watching the original “Poseidon Adventure” on local TV while I was growing up. If I’m not mistaken it was one of the disaster movies that they show on TV sponsored by a brand name cigarette company back when they were allowed to sponsor shows on air. I distinctly remember watching it, “Towering Inferno” and “Earthquake” in the same week but now cannot recall why I was so excited about it. I guess it was one of those things that I got excited about as a child that just doesn’t make sense why anymore years later. Other that the basic premise about a cruise ship getting hit by a big wave and turning upside down so some survivors need to make their way out of the doomed ship, there was nothing much that I could recall to compare it to the recently released shorten titled remake.

I have to admit that I was fairly impressed by the opening shot of Wolfgang Petersen's “Poseidon”. The use of the seamless shot that follows a jogger’s morning run from one end of the ship to the other was really successful in conveying both the geography of the ship as well as the immense size of the soon doomed ship. Audiences were quickly introduced to the setting of the movie as lovingly as any leading character within this short sequence. I found it to be one of the more pithy and memorable opening scenes that I have seen in a movie this past year and it really helped to set the mood for what was about to follow.

Introductions to the main characters whose adventure the audience will be following were also dispensed in a fairly expedited manner. The jogger that we first saw in the opening scene was ex-Navy Dylan Johns (Josh Lucas) and within minutes, every other principal character is accounted for. This includes the former firefighter and ex–NYC mayor Robert Ramsay (Kurt Russell), his head-strong daughter, Jennifer (Emmy Rossum), and fiancé, Christian (Mike Vogel); the recently dumped gay architect, Richard (Richard Dreyfuss); the plucky single mom, Maggie (Jacinda Barrett) with the spunky kid, Connor (Jimmy Bennett); the good-hearted Hispanic waiter (Freddy Rodriguez) and his stowaway friend (Mia Maestro); the ship's captain, Captain Bradford (Andre Braugher); Stacy Ferguson from the Black Eyed Peas playing Gloria, the shipboard chanteuse and Kevin Dillon playing a jerk who calls himself Lucky Larry. Given the short time that they took to introduced these characters, these simplified stereotypes were all the audience had to go on at this point of the movie.

A scant 15 minutes into the film, the characters’ world are already turned topsy turvy as an enormous rogue wave hits the ship causing it to roll into the water. Suffice to say that it was an morbidly exciting sight to watch as pandemonium ensues following the capsizing of the boat in the wake of the wave. Death by drowning, fires, electrocutions, impaling and crushing speedily dispatched the legion of faceless extras not lucky enough to be listed in this film’s main credit title. Once things settled down, the film really starts as the core group of survivors decide to take the risk of traversing the ship to get to the hull which is now above them to escape the doomed vessel against the orders of the captain. By this time, audiences could predictably expect that anyone who is not in the group leaving the room where they were in would shortly become fish-food and true to form, the Captain and Gloria meet their fate heroically posed when the water broke through the ballroom ceiling surrounding the location where they were left behind.

Spared of the others’ fate, the remaining group of survivor tried to make their way through fires, claustrophobic crawlspaces and endless water logged hallways to escape to the hull of the boat. As in every disaster movie I’ve seen, not everyone would survive the journey. While it is an inevitable occurrence in the genre, I had hoped that their deaths would have had some meaning in terms of groups dynamics and character development in the remaining survivors. Unfortunately for this film, group dynamics and character development apparently was not high in the list when they scripted this soulless feature. At times it felt like the characters were mechanically following a set path and the deaths that happened along the way felt like it was ticked of from a predetermined checklist. While it could be argued that in a real life situation, character development is the last thing you would be concerned about but the omission of a character arch for the survivor that audiences were suppose to root for in this move left me feeling unmoved by their plight.

While it must have been physically demanding for the actors, “Poseidon” doesn’t feel like a film that would vigorously test an actors dramatic range. Most lines were either proclamations of the obvious ("We gotta keep moving up!" ) or expository backstory dialogue that left little impact on any of the characters. Fortunately the script was not unlike the rest of the movies in this genre. I do have to admit that I found the story direction to be fairly straightforward and somewhat uninspiring as these survivor make their way out of the bowels of this doomed ship. There were several key story points that I found to be exciting, notably how they have to nearly drown to go though the ballast tanks, but unfortunately it was too far in between to sustain the excitement.

In the end, “Poseidon” is a short and well executed film that clocks in at a mere 99 minutes of screen time. While at times there is the sense of just going though the paces and a widening gap of emptiness that seemed to grow after the rogue wave hits, the film is fairly serviceable as a summer release. It does look technically accomplished but I would have liked to be able to empathized with the characters more. Unlike the titular ship, I don’t think that “Poseidon” would bowl anyone over too much after a viewing.

Movie Review: Mission: Impossible 3

(picture curtesy of www.missionimpossible.com)

Clear your calendar.

Summer blockbuster movie season has definitely arrive.

With new big name movies scheduled to grace our local cinemas almost weekly in the next few month, both my time and wallet will be stretched to the limit to try to catch them all. Compared to last year, the summer blockbuster movie offerings this year show much promise and hopefully will deliver on it especially those that I have been looking forward to. To start off my wallet bursting journey though the summer releases, I took some time off last weekend to view “Mission: Impossible 3” at my local cinema which I notice have raised the admission ticket prices up RM1 from the normal RM10. Good thing that the cinema is fairly close to my apartment so I can save money by buying early-bird tickets for early morning shows but this price increase bears watching if it is applied to all movies this season.

“Mission: Impossible 3”, clearly indicated by the title, is the third entry into the M:I franchise first started back in 1996. Directed by J.J. Abrams, most notably the creator of the “Lost” and “Alias” TV series, M:I3 signals the return of the franchise to the hyperkinetic style missing from the last installment of the franchise nearly 6 years ago. Tom Cruise returns for the 3rd time to reprise his role as IMF superspy Ethan Hunt who at the beginning of the film is celebrating his recent engagement to Julia (Michelle Monaghan). Unknown to his fiancée and everyone else, Hunt continues to work in the IMF as a field operative trainer after retiring from active duty. When one of his star pupils disappears during a field reconnaissance mission, Hunt is recalled by the IMF Operations Manager to lead a retrieval team to get her back. After giving Julia a plausible alibi for his departure, Hunt teams up with Declan (Jonathan Rhys Meyers), Zhen (Maggie Q) and third-time partner Luther (Ving Rhames) to attempt to rescue Lindsey (Keri Russell) who was captured while she was tracking down arms-dealer Owen Davian (Philip Seymour Hoffman) for the IMF.

Despite the pitch battle in the warehouse and wind-generator farm district in Berlin, Hunt’s team failed to retrieve their target alive thanks to a miniature explosive device implanted in Lindsey on Davian’s orders. Thanks to the clues discovered after the failed attempt, the team discovers that Owen is trying to obtain a mysterious weapon on mass destruction known only by the codename “Rabbit’s Foot”. With the info recently obtained, Hunt’s team managed to intercept and capture Davian at Vatican City where he was suppose to meet with the buyers interested in purchasing the device. Davian would shortly later escape custody after a high explosive ambush on Chesapeake Bay Bridge which seems to be orchestrated by someone within the IMF working for Davian. Thanks to the mole within IMF ranks, Davian was able to abduct Julia to force Hunt to help him retrieve the “Rabbit’s Foot” from a secure location in Shanghai. With the device successfully retrieved, Hunts races against the deadline towards a climatic encounter with Davian to save the life of his wife and his own after being implanted with a similar explosive device that killed his protégé in Berlin.

Working from a lean script, credited to Alex Kurtzman, Roberto Orci as well as the first feature director JJ Abrams, M:I3 is definitely a return to the basics of what made the original TV series so interesting to watch. At it’s core, I personally feel that the M:I franchise is always about the spy gadgets and subterfuge and we see both in action in this installment. While it was a different take on the franchise, John Woo’s visual style in the previous M:I film felt too stylized to fit into what we are already familiar with the series. Having created “Alias”, which is itself a homage to espionage shows of the 60’s including the M:I series, it is hard to avoid comparisons of this film with the show Abrams created especially when some of the character interaction we see in the film echoes those we have seen previously in “Alias”. M:I3 does have the bigger explosions and flashier special effect than the TV shows but at times it fails to raise up the adrenaline level befitting the bigger budget that it had compared to it’s small screen cousin. For the most part, the script feels more like a clothesline barely holding distinct action sequence together with a smidgen of storyline in between. Fortunately for this film, the action sequence were well executed and would surely meet the expectations of any action movie junkie watching this summer blockbuster fare.

Fresh from his stint in “Capote”, Phillip Seymour Hoffman portrayal of the icily amoral arms dealer is one of the reasons why people would want to see this movie. The character seem to exude malice direct from the pores and Hoffman stepped up admirably to the plate to realize the character on screen. It is unfortunate that his screen time is so little that if you’ve seen the first 10 minutes of the movie, then you’ve already seen the best part of his work in this movie. To a lesser degree of interest, Jonathan Rhys Meyers and Maggie Q’s characters also suffer from the lack of screen time to allow the audience to invest any level of sympathy to the characters. Ving Rhames’s character does at least get to inject a little more humanity into the story as he questions Hunt of his choice of to expose a unknowing civilian to the dangers of his line of work without giving them the chance to decide for themselves. Like the team handlers in IMF, the existence of these characters could easily be disavowed by the storyline as it had not given it sufficient development time to flesh them out to be other than the clogs in Hunt’s team.

Despite his off-screen antics, it is hard not to acknowledge that Tom Cruise definitely knows how to pull in the audiences with his trademarked million watt smile and chest-out running sequence. His performance in M:I3 is not something that we have not seen in his prior work before but it is enough of a pull for this movie. There were times in the movie that I thought that what I saw on screen from him was a little bit off somehow but it was hard to really put my finger on what was throwing me off. It could be the less than stellar chemistry between Cruise and Michelle Monaghan who played his wife even when she eerily reminded me of Katie Holmes at times. It could also be how peculiar Cruise looked while running in desperation to save her in the backstreets of Shanghai. Irregardless, Tom Cruise sufficiently gave the performance that this movie needed.

The one major disappointment that I have with this movie was the final fate of the villains of this movie. After watching the action sequence increase in frenetic energy levels and desperation as the movie went along, I personally felt a bit let-down by how the movie ended. It felt too rushed and too simplistic an ending after all the buildup that proceeded it. Other than ending more on a whimper than a bang, “Mission: Impossible 3” has all the components of a fun summer blockbuster movie going for it. Good action sequence that are not bogged down by heavy drama in between and sufficiently simple storyline to follow would surely appeal on an escapist level. Just don’t go in expecting to find a deeply coherent reason why the characters do the things they do in the movie and you’ll be fine.